“It’s hard not to be romantic about baseball. This kind of thing, it’s fun for the fans. It sells tickets and hot dogs. Doesn’t mean anything.

-Billy Beane, Moneyball [2011]

“In a tiny way, I almost feel responsible. I’m the one who sent him to Thailand in search of low-cost whistles, filled his head with pseudoerotic tales of my own Opium excursions… plus, I gave him some phone numbers of places he could score near the hotel.”

-J. Peterman, Seinfeld [1998]